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Telling your children about the divorce

On Behalf of | Jan 11, 2022 | Family Law

Couples often struggle with how to break the news of the divorce to their children. It is a traumatic event in any child’s life, and how parents communicate divorce could set the tone for how the children deal with it going forward. Below are some ideas for how West Virginia parents should discuss divorce with their children.

Parents should try to be united

The most important thing is for parents to try to present a unified front to their children. This means that when possible, they should speak to their children together, no matter how difficult the conversation is. Ideally, children should hear about the divorce from both parents at the same time. Parents should try to put aside any hard feelings as much as they can when they have this conversation.

Plan the conversation

As parents, you should plan what you are going to say to the children beforehand because this can be a very emotional moment. If you need to write out a script, it is better than running the risk of making an offhand or stray remark that could upset the children or start a fight.

Do not cast blame

Parents need to avoid blame at all costs in front of the children. Even though parents have their own stories and narratives, they should not share them during this conversation. Doing so would only start the children’s post-divorce life on the wrong foot. However, you may need to touch on the reason why you are getting divorced without casting blame.

The initial conversation with the children is critical. Parents cannot let it degenerate into a bitter conversation, even though there will be some sadness. No matter what, both parents must try to maintain as even of a disposition as possible and focus on the children.